So here's the deal. I was a former card-carrying member of the Beth Moore groupie fan club. The first Beth Moore study I participated in, I also led because the original leader had to back out at the last minute. The study was A Woman's Heart: God's Dwelling Place about Moses and the tabernacle. I was riveted. I was hooked. I spent so much time in my Bible and felt like I learned an incredible amount about biblical history and the character of God. So, then I led anotther one and another one. In the meantime, I also attended my first Living Proof Live conference in Lebanon, MO. I've since been to Living Proof conferences in various place around the US. I don't know how many, but I would suspect around 7 or 8.
When we moved to Wisconsin in 2007 for my husband to plant a church, he took a year to study the area and see what and where the needs were. During that time, we visited church after church after church. We had family church at home on Sundays for the four of us, but we really had no church home. While it was good "research" it was also exhausting and we felt very disconnected from a community of believers. We certainly became aware of the need and purpose of Christian community. During this time, I was craving that connection with likeminded people and decided that I would look for a Bible study in the area that I could get involved with. It turned out that the church we visited that next Sunday was just getting ready to start Beth Moore's Believing God study, one I hadn't done yet.
I joined this group and it was awesome. Two of the women were PWs from this church and it was nice to form a friendship with them. My husband already knew both of their husbands. Two of the other women in the study were church members there and then there was another random woman---a seeker, if you will. The first time we watched the accompanying DVD I realized that Beth Moore doesn't translate well. Sure, we speak English in Wisconsin, but the homespun humor and the "darlin's" just don't work in the upper Midwest Everyone enjoyed the study and got a lot out of it, but it seemed to be IN SPITE of Beth Moore, not because of her. The seeker especially, seemed a litle disturbed by the presentation.
Fast forward to our little church plant about 1.5-2 years later and we do our first women's Bible study. We picked Anointed, Transformed, and Redeemed: A Study of David by Beth Moore, Kay Arthur, and Priscilla Shirer. I had done several Kay Arthur studies in high school and I wasn't at all familiar with Priscilla. We had a smalll motley crew of me, and 3-4 other women from our church plant. Three of them were believers and one was not, but was a faithful church attender trying to figure out what she believed. As with all Beth Moore studies, this one had extensive homework requiring 5 days of study per week. All the other times I had done a BM study I had been a stay at home mom or worked very part-time. Lesson number one I learned was that a BM study is not realistic for a woman who works full-time outside of the home. While I know that some women do it, for me it came down between family time or time doing homework. One might argue that I still need to be spending time in my Bible and that's true. However, there's a difference between spending time in scripture and doing silly homework/busywork like writing a specific verse three time or going on a biblical wild goose chase looking up random verses that really don't pertain. As the nonbeliver in our group stated, "That was a $hitload of homework and I can't get it all done." The homework requirement wavers between encouraging legalism for those doers like me or becoming defeatist for those who can't get it done. And so, so much of the reading is just personal stories from Beth Moore that aren't crucial to understanding the scripture.
Even though I am a native Southerner, born and bred in Alabama and having lived in the south all of my life, when I look through my Midwestern lenses, Beth Moore is not relevant. Her homey humor, "beloved," and "bless your heart" sayings don't translate. I would watch the faces of native Wisconsinites as they watched her DVD. They thought she was cheesy and as much of an over-the-top caricature as Jeff Foxworthy. And then there's her "girl banter" in which she jokes about the trouble of being female. I can remember a particular DVD is which she describes visiting Africa for the first time and sleeping in a tent (gasp!) and realizing that there were no outlets to plug in her curlers, straightener, etc. (double gasp!). "You girls, know what I'm sayin', right? We wouldn't be caught dead without our face on and our hair did." Hah! Most of the Wisconsin women I know can shovel snow, chop wood, and milk a cow without batting an eye. So many of my students grew up on dairy farms and were out milking cows by 5 am, shared a room with 4 other siblings, and didn't have a car until they graduated from college and bought their own. Concern about curling their hair in Africa would not rank in their list of concerns. And quite frankly, she's very patronizing to women and holds very, very strict gender stereotypes. Finally, as a church planter's wife, I have realized how much religious-speak peppers Beth Moore's speech. We spend much of our time with people who have no experience in the church and have limited exposure to the Bible. Beth Moore is hard to follow because of all of the religious language she uses and spiritual assumptions she makes.
So Beth, I'm breaking up with you. Your niche is in the south, but people up here just aren't buying what you're selling.
11/18/13 Thank you all for your comments to the post, but positive and negative. I have learned a lot from many of you. However, others of you have been hateful and non-constructive. I love to engage in healthy debate with people who can argue effectively from both sides of an issue, but I will not allow you to "come into my living room" (my blog) and hurl insults. Therefore, no more comments to this blog are being accepted.
2/20/14 I have written a follow-up here: http://thesecretlivesofpastorswives.blogspot.com/2014/02/the-day-my-blog-blew-up-follow-up.html
Hi Pam,
ReplyDeleteI ran across your blog by chance when searching for "Pastors Wives Stories" on Google. I'm a pastor's wife myself, just needed to read a few pastor's wives' experiences today to remind myself that I am not alone :)
Anyway, your post gave me a chuckle, because as a former Southern Baptist, I totally identify with your loss of love for Beth Moore. The folks in my church, even though we're still in the South (NC) don't really identify with her well, either.
I have found the ladies tend to relate to studies by Elyse Fitzpatrick. Have you ever read anything by her? She has a lot of good books on a variety of Biblical topics that can be used for women's Bible studies. Just a suggestion!
Hi Laura,
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comment. No I haven't heard of Elyse Fitzpatrick. I'll have to check her out.
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ReplyDeleteI read you post and while I agree that the colloquialisms Beth says may not translate, that is true from one place to another. There is always colloquialisms that pertain to that area and not others, but it is not about her colloquialisms. It is about the message she delivers ... Scripture is important and we won't know God deeper if we are not spending time in His Word. We all relate in different ways so hopefully Beth was a catalyst for other women's studies. She is not the be all end all, but as I am someone who loves sticking her nose in a book and learning, I happen to like the challenge of her studies ... and yes, I work full-time.
ReplyDeleteThe goal is to get in God's Word. That's all. We are so fortunate to live in these days where there are so many resources available. Hopefully your group will find some that are more suiting. Best wishes!
Why didn't you, of all people, just leave the Beth Moore studies alone and go in peace? If she were mishandling the Word of God I could see you calling her out on that. The only fault you have found with her is as it relates to her teaching style, and format. So what? Why do you feel the need to harm your sister in Christ by holding her up to ridicule in public? The problem, beloved daughter of God is not with Beth Moore. You could have dropped her studies quietly and gone to other good teachers in the Word. When is the last time you prayed for Beth Moore? Did you ever write or contact her regarding your suggestions / her failings/ your discontents as is Scriptural or did you just gossip and slander her? The problem beloved daughter of God, is in your heart, not in Beth's teaching style. Ask the Lord to show you if you are looking for approval from other sisters who agree with you rather than for approval from Him. Seek the Lord's wisdom to see if there is sin in your life of which you need to repent. What you've written here says more about you and where you are in Christ than negative things about Beth. I fear for you beloved, that the seeds of disillusionment, bitterness and envy have taken root in your heart. You may get lots of applause for the mayhem you've written here, but you have not acted in love or according to Scripture.Please pray, beloved, and seek God. These words are not easy to share,nor to write, but my heart is grieved for where you must be to behave so unseemly towards another sister in Christ. ~ Sincerely, Joy
ReplyDelete@Woman at the Well - You are obviously right. There must be sin in Pam's life if she doesn't connect with Beth Moore's teaching style anymore and posts such a thought on her own personal blog. Thanks for being a prophetess and calling her out on it.
ReplyDeleteEveryone is entitled to their opionion, including Woman at the Well. You can't be ultra sensitive esspecially when you post your personal thoughts on the internet.
DeleteTrying to be funny isn't appropriate in discussing someone else's ministry, with which you find no scriptural fault. I agree with woman at the well. Refer to Psalm 19:14.
ReplyDeleteI understand your perspective. I truly do. Though I am from the South, my experience with Beth Moore's teachings and conferences is purposely limited for some of the aesthetic reasons you state. Still, Beth Moore fills an important role in the lives of many women who seek spiritual guidance and biblical teaching, and I believe that no few of them live outside of the American South. One of my sisters, who is as close to God as anyone else I have ever known, has received great edification and help through Beth Moore's studies, which have enabled her to seek God at a deeper level on her own. Beth Moore provided the training wheels. Yes, I can perceive the theatrical nature of her lectures and the extensive use of folksiness to establish a bond with her audience, but for many, her approach works. While she may seem to perpetuate stereotypes to women who lead more austere lives, I think she is simply revealing her personality and laughing at herself to interject a bit of self-deprecating humor into her lectures. In addition, I cannot say that I know of that many other women who have striven so strongly for the kingdom. I know for sure that I have not. I think we have to take people for who and what they are and appreciate our differences. If someone's personality strikes us as over the top, then by all means we don't have to buy the tickets or the books or the dvds. As for geography's effect upon your perceptions, I don't know that Wisconsin's sensibilities are a whit more valid or true than Georgia's or any other state's anyhow. Considering Beth Moore's diverse venues for speaking and conference engagements and the popularity of her materials, I think your premise is narrow and flawed. Of course, this is your blog and your platform for your thoughts. I appreciate your opening the comments to those of us who see it another way. Like Beth Moore, you open yourself to public ridicule in order to say what is on your heart. God bless.
ReplyDeleteI am from Oregon I have to say that Beth Moore's southern charm is like a down comforter to a person who is used to sleeping in a potato sack.
ReplyDeleteI think Beth would agree that it is not about her or any particular Bible Study author. Good for you for doing what feels right for your group.
ReplyDeleteJust a side note: I don't think you're being graded...you can break the rules! You don't have to do the homework if you don't want to.
Thanks! I smile when I read your blog. I understand it. Have you read the books from Elizabeth George? I think she stays closer to the Bible then Beth M ?
ReplyDeleteGreetings from Holland
I am saddened by the comments to Pam's personal blog. This is exactly why we need Pastors Wives Conferences. Obviously, pastors wives are still being held to a standard of perfection (which we are not) and aren't allowed to have opinions about anything. Pam simply wrote from her heart and then gets slandered for speaking what she has been struggling with. Women-before you seek to pass judgements on an issue that one woman has with a particular Bible study, ask yourself if you passed judgement or openly voiced your opinion on the men who set off the bombs at the Boston marathon, or a particular political party, or the person on the side of the street asking for money. We all do it, even I am guilty. We should be supportive, offer suggestions, and ask how we can pray for each other, not be a stumbling block.
ReplyDeleteSr.GoGirl here. Gee whiz folks. Isn't it wonderful that God has created each one of us with different personalities and giftings. I am from Indiana. God has used Beth to speak to me about things in my life on the inside that need changing. I think that, perhaps, that is the real issue. Are we becoming more like our Savior no matter who He chooses to use to accomplish that purpose (Romans 8.29)? He has also used my pastor, Kay Arthur, Chuck Swindoll, Peter Scazzero (a pastor in Queens), my counselor, and so many other brothers and sisters in
ReplyDeleteChrist. Paul spoke of being all things to all people. Without compromising his integrity or walk with Jesus he made adjustments when necessary. For what purpose. To win some. To grow folks up in Christ. To mature them. On many occasions, I have found it necessary to ask Jesus by His Holy Spirit to do Psalm 139.23-24 in me. I can guarantee that He will answer such a prayer. I really don't think that there is a one of us who does not need to do such a thing. We all need purifying. A senior woman who longs for Jesus to create in
me a clean heart before Him so that I can love others as He has loved me.
Slamming Beth Moore is not christianlike, for whatever reason you choose. She is a godly woman of Christ who has and is helping thousands come closer to Christ. I agree with Woman at the Well.
ReplyDeletePam Terrel,we are all entitled to opinions, that is true. I heard about your personal blog through my mother-in-law, after I told her about Beth Moore. Mind you, my mother-in-law is someone who is struggling to have a meaningful relationship with Jesus, who has been through several abuses in her life and REALLY needs Jesus. I had told her that I've been going to a BM Bible study and I'm learning a lot, that she might want to join me. She was excited about what I told her and said she was coming with me. She decides to google Beth Moore and she stumbles upon your blog. Then she looks at me and says: "This pastor's wife is breaking up with Beth Moore because she's futile and only cares about superficial things. Beth Moore was in Africa and all she could think about was her curler, for God's sake! And if this lady is a pastor's wife, she knows what she is talking about." No need to say she didn't come with me today. Someone here defended you saying that we all expect a pastor wife to be perfect, but I don't think it's about perfection. I believe that a pastor and his family are role models, specially to non-believers. The Bible says "we are surrounded by a great cloud of witnesses" and I guarantee that when you wrote this article you'd never imagine that you'd push a woman in New Jersey further from God. And I don't know how many others. You are, indeed, entitled to break up with Beth Moore. You are, indeed, entitled to disagree with her. Women in Wisconsin are entitled to not agree with her. Beth Moore will NOT please and cover the needs of all women's on earth. For those women she is not able to help, God will send another vessel. And He'll keep working in His church.
ReplyDeleteYour post is very interesting. I was a pastor's wife in the South for several years and enjoy Moore’s Southern-isms myself. My issue with is not with her style but the content of her theology and teaching. It is extremely heavy on positive psychology (strength, confidence, conquering insecurity, etc.) Indeed, many of her themes are life-skills coaching wrapped in Christian language. e.g. “Only you can decide how your fires will affect you. Will you be sanctified or scarred...” (A Woman's Heart). "God wields incomparably great power for those who choose to believe. Read it again! Incomparably great power! More than enough to break the yoke of any bondage. Our belief unclogs the pipe and invites the power to flow" (Praying God's Word). Moore manages to wrestle the focus back to "my" belief and "my" ability to make God's power flow. She does preach the Gospel message but it is always attached with benefits for “you”. I know she is talented, popular, and has indeed helped many women, but the teaching is problematic.
ReplyDeletePam, It's good that you broke up with BM. Your reasoning should have been more along the lines of her lack of theology and improper exegesis of scripture. See http://carm.org/beth-moore
ReplyDeleteI stumbled across your blog and just had to read it because I have been a BM fan for a long time and now not so much. I haven't completely given up her studies, but I just find that I'm looking for something different sometimes as I'm growing spiritually. There's nothing wrong with Beth if that's what you like. She is long-winded sometimes when I just want a concise statement. I don't always complete the homework, but I do try to at least read it. I have found that I identify with some pastors better than others even though they are all preaching truth. Some preach with more depth, some with humor, some with other things and in different seasons of my life, different things appeal to me. Different strokes for different folks. Nothing wrong with expressing your opinion and quite frankly, no one's opinion is going to stop me from listening to someone I like. I just try to say the person doesn't appeal to me at this time so I won't get some of the comments you received. :-) One of my friends actually got saved during a Beth Moore study. She had never heard the Word preached like that. So I don't knock her, but I do explore other options. My small group used Jennifer Kennedy Dean earlier in the year. Her Set Apart study on the beatitudes was good and I plan to check out some of her others. Her videos are fairly short (10-20 mins). Some of the homework is long, but again, you do what you find helpful. Thanks for sharing your opinion!
ReplyDeleteI just found your post and read it. I laughed because I'm an Alabama girl that has also moved up north to Wisconsin (as a pastor's wife).....they could care less about having makeup and hair perfectly in place for the very reasons that you mentioned. She doesn't relate well to these women, but I don't hold with all she says either. I agree with eye duh hoe an on her lack of theology among other problems. And, as one person posted, Elyse Fitzpatrick is scriptural and seems to relate well to most women--excellent choice, as are several other good Christian authors and speakers.
ReplyDeleteI'm not going to go out of my way to crucify Beth or anyone. However, my concern over this whole trend of mega Bible research studies, running to mega seminars and even paying money to do so, and a lot of Martha-like activity, is that we are so busy with this, there is no time to walk with the Master and listen, or time to reach a lost world within five blocks of our churches. ?
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